And so my body pulls on the handbrake, the emergency stop, I over exert myself, work too long and too hard, try to fix problems that are not mine to deal with and am generally just met with a scornful look from one of the operators, who should be overseeing the work, whose job I am actually doing from time to time. This morning already I felt rubbish and during the day that did not improve even in the slightest. I climbed up the towers again which we are working on, which are about 50 metres in height and I felt dizzy and disoriented, not my finest moment up there, but not my worst either, that happened yesterday. But the emergency stop has been activated and I now have a 39.4 degree fever and am getting ready to go to bed. Just a few thoughts that I’d like to share first though.
I am not the enemy that lives inside of you or me I am not the one who is messing up the best of plans I am not the target of your anger and frustration But I am, however the one feeling the brunt of it And I am not capable of standing up and tell you why.