Trying to put
into words
the feelings
I do not even
know to be there

slowly being consumed
by the gripping fear
of all that I lost
all that I never
will have or obtain

I see myself
crawling again
along the road
that only leads
to more pain

so I throw my all
my old defences at it
the tried and tested
always failing methods
in an act of desperation

I know not
what is left
or where to go
all I know
is I am looking for another way out.
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